What About My Scars?

Note: In "Dear Shira", city names and other details are changed to protect the privacy of the people involved.

Belly Dancing Belly Dance Belly Dancers

Dear Shira,

After having a 10-pound baby four years ago, I have severe stretch marks that go 2 inches above my navel.They don't really bother me but my teacher says that body scars distract the audience from the actual dance. So far it hasn't seemed to bother anyone in performances, though sometimes in class I feel a little uncomfortable.

I don't feel comfortable in body stockings. I love to dance and I really hate to think that people would judge me for my scars. Tell me honestly what you think. 

--Proud Mother

Belly Dance Bellydance Belly Dancing Bellydancing Belly Dancers Bellydancers Bauchtanzen

Dear Proud,

Your teachers are correct that the stretch marks (or any other obvious scars) would probably distract some audience members. But is that important? Maybe, maybe not. It depends on whether you aspire to getting paid to do nightclub gigs, bellygrams, and private parties, or whether you are content dancing just for joy. Also, it depends on whether you are dancing in an intimate setting (for example, a restaurant in which you're dancing between the tables where the audience can get a close-up look at you) or a more removed setting where you are on a stage and the audience is some distance away from you.

As adults, our bodies come with histories. We have histories of injuries, pregnancies, and surgeries. As dancers, we must consider those histories, both in terms of how we move and also in terms of what we choose for costuming. The key is to make peace with whatever our bodies have endured in the past, accept what they are in the present, and adjust for them as necessary.

How Do You Feel About Those Scars?

First, don't let your scars keep you from enjoying the dance. Whether you are a hobbyist or a professional, you can dance in spite of the scars.

If your scars make you feel self-conscious, then you probably should find a way to cover them. If you're self-conscious about your appearance, then you won't be able to give your full attention to your dancing, and therefore you won't dance as well.

But if you feel neutral about them, or if you're proud of them, then you don't have this as a reason to look for ways to disguise or cover them. From your letter, it sounds as though your scars are not inhibiting your ability to dance freely when you perform.

Do You Aspire To Be A Pro?

If you aspire to becoming a paid professional dancer, performing in nightclubs and delivering bellygrams, then you will need to find a way to cover or disguise those scars, either with costuming, jewelry, or makeup. People who pay for a professional dancer expect the illusion of glamor, and scars don't fit the glamorous image.

People expect a different standard from a paid professional versus a hobbyist. This is just as true for Oriental dance as it is for painting, music, or any other art form.

If you want to represent yourself as a professional dance artist, you'll need to conduct yourself as one, and that goes for paying attention to your appearance as well as your dance quality and business practices.

In other words, boldly letting vivid scars shout, "I'm here! I'm here!" when you dance will probably inhibit your ability to get professional dance jobs. See below for suggestions on options for how to cover or disguise them.

But What If You Just Dance For Fun?

If you aspire only to having a good time dancing in student-level performances such as nursing home performances, belly dance events, student recitals, etc. then do whatever you please. Your teacher has done her job in giving you reasonable advice, but only you can decide whether following that advice is right for you. If you don't like her suggestion of a body stocking, you might try challenging her to suggest another alternative--maybe she'll come up with another idea that you do like better! Once she has given you her recommendations, thank her graciously and sincerely for her input, give it due consideration, and decide for yourself what (if anything) to do about it--just as you would do with any other advice. If you decide to take no action on her comments about the scar and she mentions it again, just smile pleasantly and say, "I've thought about it, but decided that leaving my midriff bare is what's right for me. But thanks for wanting to help me!"

I should warn you, however, if you should decide to take no action on your teacher's advice, she may decide to not offer you the same types of performance opportunities she offers her other students. Some teachers are very particular and offer troupe membership or solo performance opportunities only to students who meet their criteria for how a dancer should look/dance/behave.

You have the right to refuse to cover your scars. She has the right to exclude you from some performance opportunities she may make available to her other students. Keep that in mind as you weigh what you want to do, and make sure you're ready to accept the consequences of your decision, whatever it may be.

So, What Can You Do About Those Scars?

Start by honestly assessing just how visible, how obvious those scars are. If you got them 20 years ago and they've faded to being rather faint by now, maybe they're not a major issue. But if they're still very vivid and contrast dramatically with your skin color, then artfully covering or disguising them is probably a good idea.

For what it's worth, body stockings aren't the only way to minimize the effect of scars. Maybe one of these ideas will be more appealing to you than the body stocking you've considered:

  • Some dancers wear belly dance costumes that look like elaborate evening gowns, dripping with beaded fringe, instead of the bra/belt ensemble. In the photograph to the right, well-known dancer Morocco from New York City is wearing one of these beaded confections, and she doesn't even have any scars on her midriff that need covering! These dresses are modeled on traditional Middle Eastern garments, but have been modernized and made glittery for stage.
  • Look for body makeup that is designed to cover scars. You may have to shop around a bit, but it does exist! One brand name, Dermablend, is sold in department stores such as J.C. Penney. Even if the general shape of the scar is still visible after you put the makeup on, it will probably reduce the level of contrast between the scar's color and that of your neighboring skin, and therefore make the scar less obvious.
Morocco Wearing Beledi Dress

  • One dancer I know who has a horizontal scar on one side of her abdomen used make-up to draw a sword design right on top of it. Eventually, she got a permanent tattoo there of a sword so that she wouldn't have to keep drawing it every time she performed. It looks very elegant, and audiences often comment favorably on it.
  • Dancers who prefer a folkloric look may wear a tunic top that comes just below hip length, with their belt worn over the top. This may be paired with either a skirt or pantaloons.
  • If you prefer the two-piece bra/belt set, you might consider adding a stomach drape to your costume. This is jewelry or beaded fringe that attaches to your dance bra and covers your stomach. You can make your stomach drape from fringe, beads, coins, glittery fabric, or other materials that suit your costuming style. This, too, is popular among dancers who don't have scars, so you'll be right in style with everyone else if you go this route! Many people call these drapes "tummy flutters" because they can accentuate your stomach rolls and flutters.
  • If you have a surgical scar (or injury) on your upper back, then perhaps long hair (a wig, maybe?), a vest, or a headdress that hangs down your back will provide attractive coverage.

You have a number of choices on what to do. Just decide what's important to you, and then act accordingly.

--Shira

Belly Dance Bellydance Belly Dancing Bellydancing Belly Dancers Bellydancers Bauchtanzen

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